It's been a long week.

[oceantheorem]

This week has been twelve years long. Twelve years--one for every hour of sleep I got this week.

I think I'm definitely trying to do too much. I'm trying to grow up too quickly. I'm trying to hold down a job in a lab and grow a transgenic mouse colony and be a junior in college all at the same time--and I'm barely 19. I'm a sophomore as far as years in college go. I'm getting ahead--of myself. I can't keep up with my schedule. I feel like Hermione Granger, except she had that cool clock thing--she could MAKE time to sleep. I just DELETE time to sleep. I've replaced sleep with coffee. Lots and lots and lots of coffee. Between 8 pm Sunday night and 10 am Tuesday morning, I had like 14 cups of coffee. This has to stop. This HAS to stop.

The problem is, I don't know how to solve this problem. I can't slow down. That would be stupid and counterproductive. I can't drop classes or stop working. If I stop working I'll never get started again, and I'm supposed to do my senior thesis (this year!) in this lab. I can't drop classes--if I go below a certain amount of credits I'll lose financial aid, and I'll have to move everything back a quarter. That's a double financial whammy. I lose aid AND I have to stay an extra quarter.

So I don't know what to do. I've tried cutting out a social life, and that just makes me a cold bitch, and I hate being a cold bitch. That makes me really unhappy. I tried cutting out sleep, and that makes me sluggish and stupid, and I HATE being stupid. I tried cutting out Latin homework, but that only saved me twenty minutes, and I've felt guilty for two days.

I think I just need a little time off to recharge. I'm so drained....

*sigh* Well, I'm off to go work on some homework or something. Gotta get out of the computer lab--other people need the computers.

Comments

[steelwin.livejournal.com]

If it makes you feel better, I went through the same thing this week. I stayed up until 6:30 doing homework this morning and then got up at 8:30 for a 9:00 class. I decided that this is unacceptable in any circumstances because, (among other things I did this in high school, and obsessed neurotic Asians with no life are like this,) being a sophomore/junior in college is one of the only times in your life when you can (in good conscience,) get drunk and pea off a roof. So, even though I’m working on a Spanish major, I used my annual-drop to drop the only Spanish course I’m taking this quarter. (Not necessarily to get drunk and pea off roofs, but more so I could focus on logic and math and postmodern lit and life.) For me, Spanish will always be around, and, although I realize that you are under financial pressures, if you don’t have time to run on the beech and swim in the ocean in your favorite town, than life for you doesn’t seem worth living. Just some advice; take it or leave it.