I meant to update when I got back to SC. I really did. I just... didn't have a chance. Jamie and I spent about a week and a half solid together, and Ann was staying here while she looked for a place to live after coming back from Australia, so I didn't spend much time on the internet. And then a lot of other stuff happened.
I've been accepted to Yale, with an offer and everything. They called me on January 6 to tell me I'd been accepted, and then this really awesome letter came in the mail a few days later, offering me tons of money. So, while I had originally applied to Yale kind of just for kicks, I'm starting to really seriously consider going there. They have an interview weekend in February, and they're flying me out to New Haven, CT, so that they can try to convince me to go. So that will be cool.
I've also been invited to interview at UCSF and UC Berkeley. Neither one has actually accepted me yet, but they both want me to come interview. They're on the same weekend, two weeks after Yale, and through some awesome scheduling on their part I can actually make it to both of them. So that's cool too.
I went home this weekend. Mom had Elena Nicole on Tuesday, January 10, so I went home to meet my half-sister. I wasn't really expecting her to be terribly interesting or terribly cute, but I thought it would be good to meet her. No. I was horribly wrong. She's colicky. She slept for about 15 minutes at a time, and spent the rest of her time either crying or eating. She spent a LOT of time crying. So no one, including me, got any sleep at all this weekend. She slept for about 40 minutes Saturday evening while I was holding her, and by the end of the 40 minutes I almost liked her. Then she woke up and screamed for 20 minutes.
Babies are not cute and they are not fun and this has gone a LONG way toward convincing me to not have babies for a long time.
I'm also still just unbearably mad at my mother. I want to hit her. I want to throw things at her and seriously injure her. I want to make her bleed. I'm not usually a violent person, and I don't think I've ever been this mad at her. And I have no idea how to deal with this. You can't put a baby back, and even if you could, this isn't about the stupid fucking baby. It's about my mother forgetting that I exist. It's like that time in high school when I was invisible, except now it's my mom and not my friends that can't see me. I think she might have done some serious irreversible damage to our relationship.
Jamie and I also had some sort of weird... tiff... the other day. But we're back to being good. It was weird being in a tiff with him. It wasn't a fight, but it wasn't pleasant. I hate being at odds with him. But we've got really good communication, so I think we're going to be okay. Things are back to normal.
Anyway. I have a stupid paper to write tonight, for a class I actually like, so I guess I should go do that.
I've been accepted to Yale, with an offer and everything. They called me on January 6 to tell me I'd been accepted, and then this really awesome letter came in the mail a few days later, offering me tons of money. So, while I had originally applied to Yale kind of just for kicks, I'm starting to really seriously consider going there. They have an interview weekend in February, and they're flying me out to New Haven, CT, so that they can try to convince me to go. So that will be cool.
I've also been invited to interview at UCSF and UC Berkeley. Neither one has actually accepted me yet, but they both want me to come interview. They're on the same weekend, two weeks after Yale, and through some awesome scheduling on their part I can actually make it to both of them. So that's cool too.
I went home this weekend. Mom had Elena Nicole on Tuesday, January 10, so I went home to meet my half-sister. I wasn't really expecting her to be terribly interesting or terribly cute, but I thought it would be good to meet her. No. I was horribly wrong. She's colicky. She slept for about 15 minutes at a time, and spent the rest of her time either crying or eating. She spent a LOT of time crying. So no one, including me, got any sleep at all this weekend. She slept for about 40 minutes Saturday evening while I was holding her, and by the end of the 40 minutes I almost liked her. Then she woke up and screamed for 20 minutes.
Babies are not cute and they are not fun and this has gone a LONG way toward convincing me to not have babies for a long time.
I'm also still just unbearably mad at my mother. I want to hit her. I want to throw things at her and seriously injure her. I want to make her bleed. I'm not usually a violent person, and I don't think I've ever been this mad at her. And I have no idea how to deal with this. You can't put a baby back, and even if you could, this isn't about the stupid fucking baby. It's about my mother forgetting that I exist. It's like that time in high school when I was invisible, except now it's my mom and not my friends that can't see me. I think she might have done some serious irreversible damage to our relationship.
Jamie and I also had some sort of weird... tiff... the other day. But we're back to being good. It was weird being in a tiff with him. It wasn't a fight, but it wasn't pleasant. I hate being at odds with him. But we've got really good communication, so I think we're going to be okay. Things are back to normal.
Anyway. I have a stupid paper to write tonight, for a class I actually like, so I guess I should go do that.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 07:44 pm (UTC)From:and man...what a sucky mom-situation.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:25 pm (UTC)From:Yeah. Definitely a sucky mom situation. Thanks for the sympathy.
Love to the bunnies!
Oh--why didn't you go to Yale?
no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:29 pm (UTC)From:1. i hate the cold
2. it's too far from mi familia
3. there was *nothing* for john to do there
4. i got into UCSF
5. i decided i wanted a PhD instead of (or at least before) an MPH
personally...i think you should go to Yale. once in a lifetime chance and all...
no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:31 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:36 pm (UTC)From:UCSF had better not waitlist me, or I'm going to have some choice words to say to the person in charge. Words like, "oh god, please let me in, I'll do anything!"
no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:33 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:33 pm (UTC)From:I don't know. I'm going to go check out all the campuses before I make a decision. But this is tough. I don't mind the cold, and honestly at this point being far away from my family sounds nice, but the idea of being 3000 miles away from Jamie for at least two years, assuming he could get into an east-coast school when he applies, kind of makes me feel nauseous. Yale is great... and I don't want to choose schools based on a boy... but still.
I'll probably ask for more advice again in a few weeks. Thanks for the input, though. Much thinking shall be done.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:32 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-16 11:34 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-18 12:53 pm (UTC)From:so the other day... i wrote a memo.
Date: 2006-01-19 08:45 am (UTC)From:*hugs*
and i love you! you make me stupid!
I'm gonna go... to the... water... machine. Yeah.
Date: 2006-01-19 10:17 pm (UTC)From:*hugs* Love you too!
Re: I'm gonna go... to the... water... machine. Yeah.
Date: 2006-01-20 08:43 am (UTC)From: